Why your self-doubt is actually a good thing (and how to use it)

Feb 16

You think your self-doubt is a problem. And you couldn’t be more wrong.

Lemmee tell you why confidence can be totally overrated and your self-doubt is actually your BFF.

It involves puppets from the 1980’s. But trust me - It’s good

I’m a visual person. And when I think of self-doubt, I think of this one scene from the movie, Labyrinth.

(Haven’t seen it? No problem. Quick rundown: Jennifer Connelly has to get through a labyrinth. There are puppets. And also David Bowie. That’s all you really need to know.)

Here’s the scene:

Here is what we can learn about self-doubt from Hoggle:

“Sorry. Just doing my job.” Your brain is interested in one thing above all else - SURVIVAL. And because our brains are terrible at identifying danger, anything new and uncertain will feel dangerous. Sending an email that might piss someone off will feel as dangerous as getting eaten by a lion. So your brain will be all, “TURN BACK AND GO NO FURTHER.”
“They’re just false alarms.” You’ll get a lot of these messages. Your brain is a veritable pu pu platter of drama and doubt. And it doesn’t matter how confident you are, these thoughts never really go away. I’ve worked with millionaires and people who are struggling financially. They all have the same damn thoughts. It’s just that the millionaires are better at managing them.
“You get a lot of them...ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU’RE ON THE RIGHT TRACK.” You know what doesn’t feel scary? Doing things you’ve always done. Doing things you KNOW you can do. Your self-doubt is like a giant arrow, pointing to your growth.

The truth about self-doubt (and why it shows up when you’re growing)

Self-doubt always feels bad — but it’s actually a sign you’re on the right track.

Here’s what’s really going on when doubt shows up:

1- Your brain wants safety, not success.
To your brain, “new” = “danger.” Sending that email, launching that business, asking for that promotion? Feels the same as getting chased by a bear.

2 - Doubt doesn’t disappear with success.
Even the most confident people still have “What if I’m not good enough?” thoughts — they’ve just learned not to believe them.

3- Doubt is a growth signal.
If you only ever do what feels safe, you never grow. So when self-doubt pipes up? That’s your brain saying, “Oh, we’re leveling up!”

How to deal with self-doubt like a pro

You only have so many options when it comes to these messages:

Believe them (not recommended)
Ignore them (doesn’t work great)
Argue with them (exhausting)
Acknowledge them and keep going anyway

Here’s how:

1. Don’t believe everything you think

Your thoughts aren’t facts. They’re just old safety programs running in the background. Acknowledge them — but don’t let them drive.

2. Don’t ignore your self-doubt

If you try to shove your doubt away with “Just think positive!” energy, it’s going to come back louder. Like a toddler mid-tantrum, it just wants to be heard.

3. Stop arguing with it

Affirmations don’t work if you don’t believe them. Instead of yelling “I AM CONFIDENT!” at your mirror, try: “It makes sense I feel nervous — and I can still do this.”

4. Keep moving (even when you doubt yourself)

You don’t need to feel confident to take confident action. Let your self-doubt come along for the ride — it just doesn’t get to drive.

How to succeed, even when you don’t feel confident

Outside of hiring a psychic friend, you’re just not going to know what the future holds. But, good news! You don’t need to eliminate self-doubt to succeed.

Confidence doesn’t come before action. It comes after you do the thing scared.

The secret? Let fear and doubt ride shotgun while you take the wheel.

They can talk. They can complain.
But they don’t get to choose the route.

Bottom line: Your self-doubt means you’re growing

Your doubt isn’t proof that you’re not ready. It’s proof that you’re expanding.

Every time you take a step forward, you teach your brain that it’s safe to grow.
And that’s how confidence is built - one small, shaky, brave step at a time.

You don’t need to wait for your self-doubt to disappear.
You just need to stop treating it like the enemy.

You’ve got this.

Are you ready to do the impossible?

Hi! I’m Erica

Wife to Brendan. Mom to twins + one. Dog mom. Slow runner. Coffee drinker. GIF enthusiast.

I’m a licensed mental health therapist and life coach and career coach. I help you accomplish in 6 months that thing you’ve been thinking about doing for years.